A New Way to Approach Goal Setting

Contributed by Idea Collective Member:

Teri Kerr

Teri Kerr

Empowerment Coach with the Unstuck Duck Coaching

Eat (and enjoy) your cake – a new way to approach goal setting

“You can’t have your cake and eat it too!”

Um. Why not?

This is something I’ve never understood. If it’s my cake I should be able to do whatever I want with it. I should be able to eat the whole thing in one sitting if that’s what I want to do. I could eat it in stages – icing first, cake last. I could eat it for breakfast, share it with a friend, or bury it in the backyard if I so desired. It’s my cake!

Why can’t I have my cake and eat it too?

When it comes to our businesses we are often ingrained with the ancient programming of “pain-staking labour.”

  • It has to be hard to be good.
  • No pain, no gain
  • Anything worth getting is worth working hard for.
  • Blood, sweat, and tears — grit matters, and it’s the only way to get where we want to do. Blood, sweat, and tears — grit matters, and it’s the only way to get where we want to do.
  • I need to work my ass off to be successful, and if I don’t, I’m destined to fail.

Because of our inner (and outer) drill sergeants, we then fall into creating goals, plans and actions because we SHOULD do them.

  • I should post on social media 3 times a day, because Susan said so, and she’s so much more successful than me! (comparison-itis)
  • I should cancel my date night because I should really do another practice run of my presentation (perfectionism)
  • I should exercise every day and add a green smoothie to my morning routine because I just caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror (critical self-talk)
  • I should really have a signature program, not a mastermind because am I really there yet? (self-doubt)

I spent 9 months of my business trying to fit into someone else’s idea of success because I was “should on” by a person of influence in my life.

I have taken dozens of programs and courses because I felt I wasn’t enough on my own.

I have doubted myself, shamed myself, and turtled on the couch because I was stuck in a spiral of doubt, fear, and self-sabotage.

But what if it doesn’t have to be hard?
a new way to approach goal setting

What if we challenge the paradigm that we need to work ourselves to the bone to be able to achieve greatness?

The thing is, this hard work thing – this pain-staking labour – this hustle culture – it’s the swamp of SHOULD.

And should-goals are exceptionally difficult to stay motivated for.

What if instead of should-goals, we choose gift-goals? What it you were to create goals that not only feel like a million bucks when you achieve them, but that are a gift to self while taking action towards them?

  • Book yourself on podcasts and speaking engagements that leave you feeling confident, competent, and creative.
  • Work with clients that inspire you as much as you do them.
  • Wake up excited to get to work because you are passionate about the impact you’re making in the world.
  • Create habits that bring you joy AND get you closer to who you want to be.
  • Set yourself up for success so you have small wins every day.

Creating your intentions for your business in a way that feeds your soul is a gift. And pursuing a gift-goal is like water flowing downhill. It feels like alignment. Ease and flow. Joy.

Life is too short to be miserable. Here’s your permission slip to have your cake and eat it too!

We can talk about your gift-goals in the Idea Collective, which has an entire community of experts who can help you with any aspect of your small business.

Contributed by

Teri Kerr

Strategy Expert

I love to help people get unstuck – in career, in leadership, in mindset and in life. I offer group & one:one coaching, networking opportunities, innovation & idea generation, and masterminding to provide vision, accountability & action for your business.